We see how progress in therapy is expressed in people’s own words below. These comments are taken from authorized session transcripts and all identifying information has been removed.

Honoring Feelings

"I make decisions about something I WANT to do, and in the past I would have felt that it had to be the wrong choice or the wrong thing to do because I wanted to do it, and now I feel, OK, that’s what I want to do and I’m just going to do it and enjoy it.”

"Last week...I finally really connected with the anger that I stuffed before. I felt like I got over a big hurdle. I don't have to automatically stuff this anger. I have a chance of processing it, focusing on it instead of just running by it at 90 miles an hour… and stepping back or at least being able to say, 'This is going to be a problem.' It felt like that's a big sign, I mean that's a big sign, as in sign in the road. It's a big flag... that was invisible before... a totally invisible flag but now it's visible. It's like a big red bull in the middle of the road. I felt like I had some new rock... some foothold or something to hang, to grab on to… tool... to keep from sliding backwards into a place where I ignore myself."

Anxiety

“I feel good. I feel centered. Much better than ever. I feel very good about that." 

"My thinking is not going out of control. It’s pretty calm. Clear. Not confused…about people. Situations. I'm not beating myself over the head for things."

“The fear of showing my emotion just put me in a complete jail.”

“I just came back from a dance class. I’m not the best dancer, maybe I’ll never be the best dancer but I’ve wanted to dance ALL my life, ALL MY LIFE, and it was so not for me that I couldn’t even formulate it as a desire that I had, and now I’m doing it and it’s just unbelievable. I really was afraid of most things.”

Assertion

A client tells the therapist she spoke up in a new way and said to a family member,  “And it was so good to me to say that and I don’t feel really bad. I think that in the past I would have had nothing to say. I would have felt TERRIBLE inside and anxious. It works good. It works great! It’s like a love fest. WooHoo! It’s a good feeling. It’s a great feeling.”

A client tells her friend, ‘You betrayed my trust.’ “AND I SAID IT! I just said it. I wanted to be a good girl. I wanted to be loved. And now, who cares? If she doesn’t like me for who I am? I don’t care what she thinks anymore.”

"The point is that, instead of seething and plotting and…well, I did that, too (patient laughs), but instead of letting it escalate in my mind, I addressed it to them...told them what I wanted…That felt really good! I was very happy with that after I was done. I didn't overdo it. Or stretch it out of proportion. I just addressed it."

TH: So your anger at them was in proportion?

PT: Yeah. I didn't show anger. I didn't raise my voice. I just told them that I felt let down by them.

TH: So you've really been processing your anger, the sources of it, and now you're able to see these current situations in perspective, where they make you angry but they're not triggering that rage that would lead to some inappropriate way of dealing with it?

PT: Yeah.

TH: Congratulations!

PT: I give myself an "A" for that one.

Self-Punishment becomes Self-Care

"I'm not beating myself over the head for things." 

“There was a turning point at some point, something you said… it seemed suddenly very silly to be doing that, what for? OK, this is it, this is self-punishment. So I just drop it. I’m not doing it! It’s almost a decision. That works! It’s taking control over some things I felt I had no control over.”

Depression

"I feel happy. It's like reviving a corpse, which is what I started doing in a dream this week. I never understood that rising from the ashes could be joyful." 

Autonomy

“I think that I really belonged to everybody else. Not that they asked me, because I just had NO IDEA of what I wanted and I didn’t want to even LOOK. I would just give to people around me and resent every single person. If I’ve decided, I’m just going to do nothing right now, that’s fine and that’s a good feeling. It seems to be that I always felt that I should be doing something else, that I’m in the wrong place. If I was working on a project, I thought I should be helping out at the kid’s school. If I was at the kid’s school, I thought I should be grocery shopping. Even the little things have changed."

Self Compassion

"Your face comes to mind often when I am in one of my moods where I’m being unkind to myself and a voice comes up that says “be gentle with yourself. Be kind to this magnificent woman. I see your eyes and I see the compassion that comes from them and I “remember” to be present and real in my gentleness, to stop the self-hatred and stop the sabotaging personality from making me miserable.”